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Stop Taking Your Spouse for Granted. Show them your love.

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How to Stop Taking Your Spouse for Granted

May 10, 2021

A wedding is often looked at as a finish line – the end of a dating, engagement, and wedding planning competition. In reality, marriage is only the start of the race.

With the common phenomenon of spouses becoming too comfortable with each other, enthusiasm for the relationship can decline over time. Similarly, the excitement of living together and doing everything with the one you love eventually dies away, leaving spouses feeling bored and uninterested.

Though you still love your spouse, you may not feel the same way about them as you used to, and this can be scary! In this stage of marriage, some people may be wondering if they are doing something wrong, or even if they made a mistake in getting married in the first place.

If you notice that your life as a married man or woman is boring you, the solution may lie in your own actions. You need to be intentional with everything you do. In other words, don’t let your relationship grow stale – keep it alive by never taking anything for granted!

When you stop taking your partner for granted, all the little arguments and problems a relationship can bring up are easier to ignore. Because you have a greater appreciation for your spouse, you realize how meaningless all those little things really are.

If you want to stop taking your relationship for granted, try to...
 

1. Give them compliments

When you’ve been married for a long time, it’s easy to take the amazing things your spouse does for granted. If your spouse does something that you appreciate, even if it’s something small like making coffee or taking out the trash, tell them how grateful you are for them.

Sure, they may know that you’re grateful, but hearing your gratitude will make them feel even more appreciated and encouraged. Similarly, if you see your spouse working hard, let them know that you’re impressed with them. A simple, “Thank you,” or “Great work!” is all it takes.

2. Spend time apart

Taking some time to be apart from your spouse isn’t a sign of a bad relationship, it’s a sign of a healthy one. When you spend every day with the same person, all the special things about that person become “normal,” making them easy to ignore.

On the other hand, when you’re apart from the one you love, you realize just how much you love and miss all of the amazing things about them.

3. Switch chores

After being together for a while, responsibilities, roles, and chores will likely be split between both spouses. This can certainly make it easier to get things done, but it can also make it harder to understand each other.

If you want to understand your spouse better, try taking on their responsibilities for a day – or even better, for a week! Living in their shoes will help you see all of the work they do, and will teach you to appreciate them in a new way.

4. Think about life before your relationship

One great way to stop taking your spouse for granted is to remember what life was like before your relationship started. Think back to before you even met your spouse and try to remember how you felt.

Then, remember what it was like to meet your spouse, to fall in love with them, and to start a relationship with them.

When you take a moment to remember why you started a relationship with your spouse in the first place, you’re bringing yourself back to all those beautiful, lovey-dovey moments the two of you shared. Ultimately, this will make you feel thankful for the love you and your spouse have created.

5. Give them gifts

You don’t need a reason to give someone you love a gift. If there is something you know your spouse wants or needs, however small it may seem, give it to them as a gift.

Whether it’s a new bar of soap to replace the one they’ve almost used up, a new pair of socks to replace their torn ones, or something else that they’ve been eyeing at the store, they will not only be surprised by a gift, but will feel cared for.

6. Go on dates

People who have been married for a long time often don’t know how to keep things exciting. But really, doing anything to break up the monotony will keep the marriage feeling fun.

Plan getaways and day trips that you and your spouse know you’ll love. Go on that hot air balloon ride you’ve always dreamed of, go to that museum you’ve been meaning to go to. Even going to a new restaurant and having a classic dinner date will help your marriage thrive.
 

7. Treat each day like it’s your last

This step may seem a bit morbid, but it’s the Golden Rule when it comes to marriage. When you think of every day like it’s your last, you go out of your way to do the things that make life amazing.

If today was your last day on the planet, what would you tell your spouse? What would you do for your spouse to show them how important they are to you?

Thinking of today like it’s your last pushes you to be that loving, caring, and romantic partner that we all have inside of us. It will make you take your relationship one day at a time so that you can enjoy every moment of it.

Marriage is one of the most complicated things in a person’s life, but it can also be the most beautiful. If you’re married to someone you love, don’t wait to show them you love them.

Enjoy the relationship to the fullest by letting your spouse know how much you really care about them.

Being mindful of the way you think about your marriage will not only make your marriage feel new and exciting every day, it will also show your spouse that you’re putting in the work to strengthen the bond between you.

Marriage may be complicated, but it does’t have to be.


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